THE TRUE LOVE
True love, a concept as timeless as humanity itself, is a deeply personal and often indescribable feeling. Commonly, it’s marked by a strong and passionate affection for another person, characterized by genuine care, deep connection, and a desire for their happiness, often prioritizing it above one’s own.
Love is a decision and not mare feelings. The following are basic components of Love. 1.Commitment 2. sacrifice 3. Trust
It is built on a foundation of trust, respect, and honesty, creating an environment where vulnerability is welcomed, and emotional bonds thrive. True love involves mutual growth, facing challenges together, and a commitment that endures beyond fleeting attraction or superficial interests.
Social and biological factors also play a role. Oxytocin and vasopressin, hormones linked to pair-bonding, are released during intimate moments, strengthening emotional connections and fostering feelings of closeness and affection. Psychologically, true love incorporates attachment, where individuals seek closeness to their partner to gain a sense of security.
Perhaps most crucially, true love is selfless. It is not merely about what one can take from the relationship, but what one can give and how two people can support each other in becoming their best selves. True love accepts the full spectrum of human experience, the perfections and imperfections, and it can stand the test of time and difficulty.
Words, though they strive to express it, often fail to capture the full essence of true love. It must be felt, lived, and nurtured to be truly understood.
BIBLICAL VIEW OF LOVE
True love in a biblical context is often defined as selfless, sacrificial, and unconditional, akin to the love God has for humanity. Several Bible verses speak profoundly about the nature of true love, providing guidance on how it should manifest in our lives:
- 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NIV)
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
This passage is one of the most cited references regarding true love, detailing the behaviors and attitudes that characterize it.
- John 15:13 (NIV)
“Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”
Here, the ultimate act of love is described as the willingness to sacrifice even one’s life for others, epitomized by Jesus’ crucifixion.
- 1 John 4:8 (NIV)
“Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”
This verse connects the essence of God with love, suggesting that to truly know God is to understand and embody love.
- Ephesians 5:25 (NIV)
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”
This calls for a profound, sacrificial love in the marriage relationship, modeling it after Christ’s love for humanity.
- Colossians 3:14 (NIV)
“And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”
Love is depicted as the bond that unifies all other virtues, indicating its fundamental role in harmonious relationships.
- 1 John 4:18-19 (NIV)
“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us.”
Fear and love are contrasted here, with the verse suggesting that true love casts out fear and that love is a response to God’s love for us.
- Romans 12:9 (NIV)
“Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.”
This emphasizes authenticity in love, with a call to abhor evil and hold fast to good within the context of loving relationships.
- 1 Peter 4:8 (NIV)
“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”
The depth of love is said to be so profound that it can forgive and overlook wrongs, promoting a spirit of forgiveness and understanding.
The Bible presents true love as a reflection of divine love — patient, forgiving, sacrificial, and pure, providing an ideal for believers to aspire to in their relationships with others.
PRACTICING TRUE LOVE
Practicing selfless love—an altruistic form of love that places the well-being of others before oneself—requires intentionality and often goes against our innate self-centered tendencies. Here are some ways to incorporate selfless love into daily interactions:
Empathy: Begin by genuinely striving to understand the perspectives, feelings, and needs of others. Active listening and paying close attention without immediately thinking of your response is a powerful starting point.
Acts of Kindness: Execute small, random acts of kindness without expecting anything in return. This could be as simple as letting someone go ahead of you in line, paying a compliment, or reaching out to someone who seems lonely.
Forgiveness: Offer forgiveness when wronged. Holding grudges keeps you focused on yourself and your hurt feelings, while forgiveness frees you to love selflessly.
Service: Look for opportunities to volunteer or help out. Give your time and talents where they are needed without seeking accolades.
Patience: Exercise patience in situations that test your temper or comfort. Practicing patience is an act of selfless love, especially in stressful situations.
Gift-Giving: Share with others without the expectation of reciprocation. This might involve sharing knowledge, time, or physical gifts.
Inclusion: Make an effort to include others, especially those who might often feel left out or marginalized.
Encouragement: Regularly encourage others. Identify and affirm the good you see in those around you, which can uplift and inspire them.
Boundaries: It’s important to note that selfless love also respects personal boundaries, both yours and others’. It isn’t self-neglect or martyrdom but a balanced approach to caring.
Remember, the heart of selfless love is genuine concern for others that inspires compassionate actions. It’s a commitment to making the world a kinder, more loving place—one interaction at a time.
Raph Michael